For those of you who haven't heard, Molly made JV Cheer for her freshman year of high school!
This was a big deal in our household. She worked hard during her tryout clinics, made sure to make a good impression on her coaches, and practiced nonstop at home. It was absolutely well deserved, and I couldn't be more proud of her.
As soon as the excitement wore off, though, she realized that making the team was only the beginning. Now came the hard part. Time to put the work in.
Unfortunately for Molly, she inherited my athletic ability... or maybe I should say my lack of athletic ability.
She's never been one of those kids who just picks something up and is instantly good at it. Almost everything she's accomplished physically has come from repetition, frustration, and practice. Lots and lots of practice.
Which also means every accomplishment has meant that much more.
Lately she's been working on/struggling with her back handspring, and I've noticed something interesting. It's no longer about strength or flexibility. I think she's physically capable of doing it. The challenge now is learning to trust herself enough to throw it. It’s become a mental block for her, and she seems stuck.
As a parent, it's hard to watch. I can see the hesitation, and I know she's capable. She’s standing in that uncomfortable space between what she already knows and what she's trying to learn.
I have been in that space myself many times. It sucks. But I think that space is so important to experience. It’s where all growth happens.
None of us enjoy living there. We'd much rather stay with what we know because it's comfortable, predictable, and safe. But every meaningful change in our lives requires us to leave that place behind and step into the unknown.
It doesn’t matter if you’re learning a back handspring, starting a new job, having a difficult conversation, beginning a workout program, or changing years of unhealthy habits… the process is the same.
Just like Molly learning that she made the JV cheer team: first comes excitement, then uncertainty, and then comes the part that makes most people quit… the work.
Have you ever heard the term, "Embrace the suck"? I think it originated in the military, but I first heard it in a Brené Brown book (love her btw).
I've always liked that saying because it doesn't pretend hard things are fun. They're not.
The workouts that leave you breathless aren't fun, and neither is the soreness after trying something new.
Feeling awkward in your first week at the gym is the worst. Then there’s wondering if you're making progress when you can't quite see it yet. We hate that too.
It all kind of... sucks.
But I think the goal isn't to avoid that feeling, but to recognize it. Sit with it.
To realize that when life starts feeling uncomfortable, you're probably standing in the exact place where growth happens.
One of the reasons I love strength training so much is that it gives us a safe place to practice this.
Every workout asks something of us:
Pick up the heavier dumbbell.
Do one more rep.
Finish the set even when your legs are burning.
Come back tomorrow even when you don't feel like it.
None of those moments are life-changing by themselves, but together they slowly change the person doing them. And in doing these things, you don't just build stronger muscles. You build evidence and prove to yourself that you can do hard things, that discomfort doesn’t last forever, and that you have survived difficult moments before, so you can survive them again and again.
You’ll notice something funny starts to happen. The hard things outside the gym don’t seem quite as scary anymore. You can have those difficult conversations, take those new opportunities at work, or finally face those challenges you've been putting off.
You begin approaching life differently because you've spent months, or years, practicing what it feels like to be uncomfortable without running away from it. You face that shit!
I don't think the goal is to make life easier. Maybe it is to become someone who handles hard things better.
I have found that this is one of the greatest gifts exercise has given me. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I check out my biceps and glutes in the mirror every chance I get! But that is surface level. Exercise has given me courage. It has made me brave, and proud and strong.
That’s what really matters.
So the next time you're in the middle of a tough workout, or you find yourself facing something difficult outside the gym, remember this:
It’s not just about building your body. It’s about building your capacity to step into the unknown. That’s a skill that will serve you for the rest of your life.
A few things to think about this week:
• Growth almost always lives on the other side of discomfort.
• The unknown feels uncomfortable because you're becoming someone you've never been before.
• Every hard workout is practice for the hard moments life eventually hands you.
So this week let’s embrace the suck.
The best version of you is probably waiting on the other side of it.